Confessions Over Coffee


Soaking up the quiet of Saturday morning on my patio, I enjoy my coffee in the stillness before being productive becomes my focus.  I look up and see my eldest son standing beside me. Somehow I spawned a ninja, because I did not hear him come out the back door. I am looking at an … Continue reading Confessions Over Coffee

Driving Miss Crazy


As a mom of two boys, I believed potty training was going to be my undoing, until I faced teaching them to drive. Completely outsourcing either of these parenting joys crossed my mind, but there is no service to coach your kids to poo in the potty, and the Great State of Texas requires twenty … Continue reading Driving Miss Crazy

It’s a Book Thug Life


As parents, many of us are downright obsessed with encouraging our children to love reading. Over and over again, we are told of its importance, and the teachers send home endless reading logs and stand ready with the roll of stickers to reward the effort. The effort being all parents everywhere, remembering to make the kids fill it … Continue reading It’s a Book Thug Life

Yes, I Kiss My Children With This Mouth


I am known among my circle of friends for a lot of things. My off-kilter sense of humor. My dramatic storytelling. My ridiculous addiction of saving lost animals. But, perhaps my most infamous trait is my potty mouth. There are merchant marines who have asked me to "clean it up a little". I thought I had tempered my language … Continue reading Yes, I Kiss My Children With This Mouth

Parking Lot Personality Test


I have a very unique gift. I can tell a lot about a personality by the way a person parks. Three shining examples of my unique gift come to mind, that I will share here to illustrate my point. One busy Saturday, I was in the grocery store parking lot when a sedan rushed into one of the parking spots marked … Continue reading Parking Lot Personality Test

Colossal Emergency “Need to Pee” Parenting Fail


All the recent talk about cars due to the accident drama (http://wornoutwomen.com/2015/06/26/fender-bender-etiquette-tips/  and http://wornoutwomen.com/2015/07/09/have-toenail-will-travel/  ) has reminded our family of another infamous car moment. We live outside of Houston, Texas and as dedicated Former Students, we had season tickets to Texas A&M Football for about nine years. We made this quality family time - or at … Continue reading Colossal Emergency “Need to Pee” Parenting Fail

Have Toenail, Will Travel


So thanks to my recent fender bender I have been driving my precious children's vehicle for the last several week. Have you ever had the joy of riding in a car that is basically a driving recreation room for two teenage boys? My youngest drives it to and from school and activities, and with my eldest … Continue reading Have Toenail, Will Travel

Handy Tips for Traveling with Your Spawn


My husband and I both love to travel, and because we had our children young, most of our traveling adventures included the kids. My youngest son had visited seventeen states before he made it to Kindergarten. Along the way, literally, we noted a few key "Do's and Don'ts", so in the interest of public service, … Continue reading Handy Tips for Traveling with Your Spawn

Adventures in the Continuation of the Species


I'm in the process of planning a baby shower for a (much younger) friend, and this planning process plus watching her pregnancy grow on Instagram in cute clothes, with her barely-bigger-than-a-volleyball tummy has prompted me to reflect on the time I spent incubating my two favorite fetuses. I was 26 when I got pregnant with my oldest child. After … Continue reading Adventures in the Continuation of the Species